prince charming finally arrived

Near the end of 2012, I decided I was going to start a new business. Honestly, I didn’t really put that much into it then, because maybe the world was going to end? Possibly aliens were coming. The poles were going to shift. You remember.

When 2013 arrived, I decided I was going to make my business a priority. Cleverly, I named the computer file for my business stuff “Save Yourself”. Befuddled by what I had gotten myself into, I hired a branding coach. With her by my side, I started down the path of creating my “authentic brand”.

What that really meant was taking a courageous look at who I am, what are my stories, what am I great at, and how do I dream of serving the world. Every week, I met with my coach and was given the opportunity to step into vulnerability and talk about the stuff I never talk about: what I’m good at, what are my dreams, my fears and my hopes. Supported by my coach, who is one of the most loving creatures I know, I kept diving into areas I thought were off-limits; finding forgotten stones that were covering up hidden gems of talents and abilities.

Through this process, in no particular order:

  • I started writing a book. I travelled to NYC to learn about being an author. I stopped writing a book.
  • I was in 5 awesome weddings in one month, including one as the officiant.
  • I taught a bajillion yoga classes (I count the ones I co-teach out loud with my partner while we sleep… me “inhale right leg high”, him “exhale low lunge”. This really happens).
  • I explored the delicate power of an open heart.
  • I screamed like a lunatic while driving.
  • In meditations, I travelled to realms of unspeakable love and peace.
  • I was gifted stronger intuition.
  • I held space for clients to see their own light.
  • I rented my own office.
  • I unrented my own office.
  • I let my heart expand.
  • I saw my heart contract.
  • I took on a new name, and struggled with the weirdness of that choice.
  • I started blogging regularly and let my writing change me.
  • I read books that altered the path of my life.
  • I met people that impacted my soul at the most vulnerable levels.
  • I started writing a book, again.
  • I took a trip to LA for a conference that rocketed me into new levels of leadership, prosperity and joy.
  • I committed to living only on my heart’s path.
  • I felt more support than ever, both from my people and from my angels and guides.
  • I had days where I felt no support at all.
  • I watched new yoga teachers learn the incredible pose that is “yoga teacher”.
  • I blew my comfort zone to smithereens.
  • I dropped the prison of “say only what will keep you safe”.
  • I chose to happily seek out mild discomfort everyday.
  • I found there is a wealth of gifts inside of me, that exist for me to give to others.
  • I explored what and whom I’m giving my power to.
  • I started to honestly look at and rewrite how I relate to money.
  • I watched from my safe farmhouse as friends’ homes were destroyed in the Boulder Flood. Trapped by the waters, I could only pray.
  • I planned a bachelorette hut trip and decided I’m going to run a hut trip retreat.
  • I made my partner wear my dad’s jeans.
  • I found a deeper more intimate relationship with the feminine and the masculine.
  • I saw visions of my cells as portals to other dimensions.
  • I felt great hope, and total dismay.
  • I saw the most incredible lightning storm that ever happened. Ever.
  • I watched SpongeBob, Project Runway and Christmas Vacation, in August.
  • I asked myself what it means to have a step-ish son.
  • I didn’t ski. I didn’t cut my hair. I took a ton of epsom salt baths.
  • I thanked the water. I thanked the Earth. I thanked the air, fire and space. Everyday.
  • I prayed to my angels.
  • I stepped into leadership.
  • On my 33rd birthday, I literally burned up all my old stories. 33 is the year Hobbits come of age, but if this was Middle Earth, I’d be an Elf.
  • I uncovered what I told myself a love relationship was, and I surrendered what it actually is. I thought about running away. I chose to stay.
  • I learned to say No and I said it a lot.
  • I shed enough tears to fill a bathtub. I laughed long enough for the moon to go from New to Full.
  • I started painting again, I stopped painting again.
  • My step-ish son and I wrote a theme song for each of our cats.

I do think the Hobbits are onto something, though. But to me, 2013 was less of a coming of age and more of the year I realized that there was no “Prince Charming” coming to save me from my misery. Save Yourself seemed like a clever name for a business at the start of the year, but it actually turned out to be the theme for my year.

2013 was the year I saved myself and became my own Queen Extraordinary.