i refuse to let humanity default

We all have a default. A default set of behaviors. A default way of thinking. A default language. A default future. This default is usually based in our childhood and the way we learned to be based on our environment and our feelings about our environment. If we let our default mode run our lives, we end up in our default future.

For most of us, the default future is decent to mediocre: an okay job, a pretty okay relationship, average money, sometimes a vacation. There is nothing wrong with that. The question is, what would it be like to actually live out your dream? What if you could step into a realm where you own (no matter your age, your history, or your dramas) that you can live a life that is legendary?

If we turn our gaze to the bigger picture, we could see that humanity’s default future is a little terrifying. If we continue on the path of consumption and separation, well… we could all fill in the blanks. The reality is that in order to shift humanity’s default future, we all need to shift our own personal default future.

I’ll let you in on what I mean by default by sharing my version of it. When I’m in default, I wake up and immediately start worrying, usually about money (survival). From there I make choices throughout the day with anxiety and worry as the motivators. I worry that I’m not doing, not eating, not wearing or not saying the right thing. I look to Facebook, email, astrology blogs, books and Instagram for my answers. My attention span is 30 seconds, if I’m lucky.

My default behavior keeps me mildly invisible and totally unable to make a decision or rock the boat. If I stayed on my current default path, I would probably be a yoga teacher in Boulder until I was like 100. I would probably be single (it’s easier alone) and moving on a yearly basis. I wouldn’t be writing these blogs much. My default looks pretty great and I would probably be okay and happy. Life right now is awesome, but something in my soul says “there’s more for you here on Earth”. And not more as in more shoes, but more as in a bigger energy, deeper connections, more vulnerability, and impossible becoming normal.

So I’m listening to that urge from my soul and I’m choosing to create my life. I’m not the victim of my programming.

Creating your life isn’t something that happens one time on a rainy Tuesday afternoon. It happens everyday, with every breath. Creating your life isn’t just about what you do, it’s also about the energy you are in when you do it. I could easily write these blogs while desperately seeking approval from you to validate my existence (default). Or I could write these blogs with the simple intention of sharing the information that moves me deeply (creating). In creation there is possibility, service and connection.

For me creating my life means I have strong internal boundaries around my worry mechanism. I spend my days focused on my purpose to share love and light and activate others’ self expression. I am choosing to stop searching for approval in all the sneaky and deeply ingrained ways I have in the past. I’m choosing to live from my creativity and let myself become an empty vessel for the highest service to myself and others. Specifically, I said HELL FUCKING YES to an incredible opportunity to be coached by one of the best coaches in the world. This hell yes has asked a lot of me financially. I am so far out of my default that I can barely even recognize myself. I literally have no choice but to change the way I think and live to make this happen.

The result of creating my life in the last month hasn’t been glamorous. Although it has been full of grace, it has also been tremendously intense and messy. Ah, the paradox of life on Earth. One day last week I drove all the way from Pearl Street to Niwot screaming out loud at the top of my lungs to release frustration. There were tears, boogers and f-bombs everywhere. I spent a lot of time laying on the grass in my back yard asking for help, feeling the earth, the sun, receiving some deep breaths and knowing that this is part of the process. As cliche as it is, the metaphor of the birth canal is entirely appropriate. I am held, I have sun, I have air, I have food, I have so many loving people. I sob with gratitude and discomfort all at once.

The time is now for us to each break away from the learned behaviors that are destructive internally and externally. Let’s step up and make everyday Earth day, creative day, love day, dance day, connection day. Let me know how I can support you as you say HELL FUCKING YES to your big dreams.